I had a life altering experience this weekend. (No. I'm not talking about a guitar pick!) ;)

A few days ago I posted about seeing people through the eyes of some one who loves them. I got to do that Saturday.

We were hoping to spend time with a friend who had arranged the trip for us. Work schedules got crazy and flights were delayed. Because I take everything personally, I was having abandonment issues. I was worried how I would react when I saw her. Would I get all defensive? Play like I was mad? ( I wasn't, but 'mad' is my default defense mechanism.)

When I saw her, I felt nothing but joy! My dear friend! My friend who lives almost 1,000 miles from me, right here! I was so happy to see her, I forgot all my "issues". I grabbed her and said, "I'm so glad you're here!"

On the flight home I thought long and hard about all the emotions I had felt over the weekend. I had been selfish, no doubt. I had felt hurt. Several times I caught myself trying to justify my bad attitude. Then I realized something.

I hurt God every day. Not like my friend and I, not through miscommunications or out of control circumstances; not because of my social phobias or take-everything-to-heart attitudes. No, out of blatant defiance. And everyday God throws his arms around me and says, "I'm so glad you're here!"

I got a glimpse of myself through the eyes of the One who loves me most.